The Brutalist Report

The Onion

• Mikal Bridges Wakes Up From 4-Day Bender Next To Dead Jimmy Fallon [36d]
• Daring Fusion Restaurant Mixes Texan, Mexican Flavors [36d]
• Study: More Americans Foregoing College In Favor Of Letting The Carnival Sort Them Out [36d]
• Shams Charania Casually Tells Colleagues He Really Looking Forward To Breaking Michael Jordan’s Death [36d]
• Elderly Man Uses Library To Print Out Pornography [36d]
• Study: Reading For Fun Down Among Schoolchildren [36d]