The Brutalist Report

The Onion

• Travis Kelce Bummed Fiancée Signed Him Up For NFL Again [39d]
• Trump Demands Staff Get King Of Hormuz On Line [39d]
• Kylie Jenner Gushes Over Partner Michael B. Jordan [39d]
• Trump Beefs Up Security Presence After Frighteningly Close Brush With JD Vance [40d]
• History Of St. Patrick’s Day [40d]
• Kansas Revokes 1,700 Licenses For Being Transgender [40d]
• Friends, Coworkers Announce Plan To Gang Up On Depressed Man Right When He Feels Worst [40d]
• MrBeast Offers $50,000 To Anyone Who Can Survive Seeing What Lies Beneath His Mask [40d]
• How To Survive An Avalanche [40d]
• ‘Good Oscars, Good Oscars,’ Repeat Nominees In Forced Post-Ceremony Handshake Line [40d]
• Joel Edgerton Going Nuts In Hopes Of Getting On Oscars Jumbotron [40d]