The Brutalist Report

The Onion

• Arch Manning Running Out Of Polite Ways To Decline Eli’s Mentorship [80d]
• Report: Half Of All Uncontacted People Could Be Wiped Out In Next Decade [81d]
• YouTube Comment Section Astounded To Learn Chicks Can Rock Too [81d]
• Low Papapproval Ratings [81d]
• The Onion’s Top Songs: October 2025 [81d]
• Trump Accused Of Using Makeup To Conceal Ventilator [81d]