The Brutalist Report

The Onion

• 2nd Grader Orders 70,000 Lollipops On Amazon [319d]
• Conclave Selects First Chicago-Style Pope [319d]
• God Loses $400 Betting On Cardinal Tagle [319d]
• Pope Leo XIV: ‘There Couldn’t Be A Better Time To Get The Fuck Out Of America Forever’ [319d]
• Nervous Man Introduces Date To His Hives [319d]
• Archaeologists Uncover Embarrassing Egyptian Rockabilly Dynasty [319d]